No One Wants You Sad

Remember to make them believe you’re okay when you’re not

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

“Remember that no one likes someone sad. So tell yourself there’s hope in this. Tell yourself you’re excited about the breakup.”

I stare at the person sharing this information with me. A teacher I confide in that the person I’ve loved for years, my forever person, is leaving me. Immediately my body goes into a mode I know well. Smile. Laugh. Make a joke, people like that. Show you’re okay. Show they don’t need to take care of you. Show that you got your shit together.

My family likes to say that you get two decisions in life: to laugh at a situation or to cry. And crying is too debilitating, so we might as well laugh, right?

Laughing doesn’t erase hard emotions

Cue me years later realizing that laughing instead of crying really doesn’t do shit. You’re still a fucking mess. But now you’re a mess who is just waiting to self implode at any moment and for all those messy emotions to come and catch up with you.

I make a mental note not to share anything of serious value with this person again. When you’ve invalidated my emotions or you really are going to do more damage than good if…